Realizations

Sometimes, I'm glad no one really reads these things- because I'm about to dish out some corniness. Hold onto your hats, people who are actually reading this and are about to embarrass me just with the knowledge that you have, in fact, read it.

Anyway.

Hardly made any money today, but it certainly was a day of love. Almost everyone I came in contact with said something to the effect of "I love your ass" and it was really cool - it's like the stars were aligned or something.

I don't know why but I suppose this brought out a constant fear of mine: Death. Cliche', I know, fear of the unknown, everyone dies, blah blah blah - but it is utterly terrifying to me, the fact that, as Ted Dansen says "We're switched on and switched off. I don't want to be switched off."

I really don't know how to settle this fear. It's not like spiders, like if I wanted to, I could avoid it. I can't avoid it, man! I have an expiration date and I know this.

The only thing that gives me any kind of solace at all is the research on NDE's. That gives me some kind of delusional hope.

Please for the love of whatever is out there (if anything) do not write me messages about this. It'll freak me out. I just want to tell you about my weird phobia and get it out there, cool?

cool.

-But really, if there's nothing, if we just pop in and pop out, what's the point? if we go through 100 years or what not, learn an unbelieveable amount of things, come in contact with copious amounts of people and situations, we just throw that away? hmm. that seems like a lot of effort on creation's part for not much of a reason. Just saying. Going to go watch "drinking out of cups" now, that seems like the right thing to do.